Questions About Babies, Houses, Jeans, Taxes, Sourdough, and More!

What’s inside? Here are the questions answered in today’s reader mailbag, boiled down to summaries of five or fewer words. Click on the number to jump straight down to the question.
1. Buying stuff for baby
2. Tax loss harvesting question
3. Nice hair cutting tip
4. Thoughts on “robo investment services”
5. Which slow cooker?
6. Home ownership challenge
7. Clearing out book collection
8. Saving money on work trip
9. Afraid of culture when moving
10. Is my cell service overpriced?
11. Buying long lasting denim jeans
12. Sourdough starter advice

We spent this weekend camping. It’ll probably be our final camping trip of 2017, but it was a beautiful and unseasonably warm weekend with bright weather all the way along. My oldest son asked to bring a few friends along with him, so we were camping with a cadre of preteen boys.

It ended up feeling almost like a Boy Scout camping trip. We wandered around on trails. We went fishing. We went rowing. We went swimming. We made roaring campfires. The boys stayed up most of the night horsing around and laughing and telling stories and so on.

I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

Q1: Buying stuff for baby

We are three months pregnant and now have started to think more seriously on how we should plan our shopping for baby and mom stuff. Any pointers to propel us in the direction on how we can save money while planning for pregnancy and baby. A plan broken down in intervals of six months for next 3 years would be great or any website that can help us in doing that with checklist. Ofcourse having said that I am going over numerous products that we could use but want to be careful how we spend our hard earned money in an effective way while planning for this big event.
– Jim

I don’t think there is any kind of standard list that I can prepare for anyone. After having three kids, I definitely feel like we had far too much stuff and thus my suggested lists of what you’ll need looks starkly minimal. (I know this because I’ve talked to friends and family that have had babies recently and they basically didn’t even believe my suggestions.)

Basically, babies need to be warm, they need to eat, they need to be clean, they need a place to sleep, they need to be safe, and they need to be held. They don’t need much else. So, you need a few blankets and some baby clothes that fit, (maybe) a few bottles and (maybe) some formula and (maybe) a breast pump (depending on your feeding plans), a few cloth diapers and cloth wipes and a spray bottle, a safe car seat, and a small sturdy crib. The blankets and clothes can and should be bought secondhand.

Everything beyond those basic things is pure extra. However, many people buy lots of extra things out of convenience. Disposable diapers are a convenience purchase. Baby wipes are a convenience purchase. A breast pump is a convenience purchase (it provides enormous location convenience). A stroller is a convenience purchase (you can carry the baby, after all). A changing table is a convenience purchase (we didn’t even use ours at all for our third child, as we changed him on blankets and towels wherever we happened to be). I can’t decide for you whether those conveniences are necessary, other than to suggest trying other methods first before deciding that you need a particular convenience. Are you regularly doing something that requires this particular convenience item? You honestly won’t know until you have the child. Some things that seem essential to others might be completely useless for you, and vice versa.

Just make sure your baby’s needs are met. Are they warm? Are they safe? Do they have healthy things to eat? Do they get held? Are they clean? Take care of those needs and let the stuff you buy only serve those needs.

Q2: Tax loss harvesting question

My question is this: while the person in the example at the end of the answer wouldn’t pay long term capital gains tax on selling the $30,000 investment, they still have to pay income tax on the $30,000 as it would be considered income, right?
– Bill

Let’s say that you put $30,000 in a taxable investment – meaning not in a 401(k) or anything. Over the course of a few years, that $30,000 turns into $40,000.

You sell that investment. You get your original investment back tax free. You only pay taxes on the $10,000, and if you’ve held the investment for a while, it’s a long term capital gain. If your long term capital gains tax rate is 15%, you’re going to pay $1,500 in taxes.

In other words, you are only taxed on what you gain from an investment. You get your original investment back tax free – you can’t be double taxed on that money and you already paid taxes on it when you originally received it as income.

Q3: Nice hair cutting tip

The best way to avoid a mess while cutting your hair is simply to wet the hair before you cut it. Then, it clumps together and all falls on a sheet placed under the person whose hair I’m cutting – mine or a family member.
– Jade

That’s good advice, and it explains why many barbers and salons dampen people’s hair before cutting it.

Unless you have a complex hair style, it’s quite possible to cut it at home. As I’ve noted before, I’m a guy who prefers short hair that can pretty easily be cut with clippers, so that’s what I do at least some of the time.

Give it a try at home. Cut someone’s hair. See how it turns out. At worst, that person just goes to a barber or a hairstylist and “fixes” the damage. At best, you save $20 (at least).

Q4: Thoughts on “robo investment services”

I’m wondering what you think about the robo investment service United Income? It’s aimed at 50+ crowd. We’re in our early 50’s and are starting to feel overwhelmed by all that there is to tract as we begin to look at our retirement years. Apparently, this service will help you do this for a fee ranging between .05-.08% of your portfolio.
– Denise

My feelings on “robo investment services” are that they’re effectively index funds or target retirement funds with a higher fee. Often, the “robo investment service” charges a fee, then the things it invests in charges a fee, too, so it compounds.

Honestly? If I’m investing for retirement, I’m probably just going to open a Roth IRA with Vanguard and use their Target Retirement Fund. It basically does the same thing as a “robo investor” but cheaper.

In the end, an index fund is basically the same thing as a “robo investor.” An index fund just follows a few simple rules to govern your investments, just as a “robo investor” does. However, index funds are cheaper. I think “robo investing” is just something of a fad.

Q5: Which slow cooker?

I saw an older post on the slow cooker your family uses, but the post was a couple years old; can you point me to the slow cooker you currently use?
– Max

I no longer see the exact model that we use on Amazon (because, well, companies change models over time), but it is very similar to the Crock-Pot SCCPVL600S Cook’ N Carry 6-Quart Oval Manual Portable Slow Cooker. It’s just a large Crock Pot with a removable ceramic crock, and we’ve been using it consistently for about a decade.

We also have an Instant Pot which we sometimes use as a slow cooker, but strictly for slow cooking purposes, the Crock Pot works better. The Instant Pot has the advantage of working as a small pressure cooker and rice cooker, which is useful for many other dishes. We’ve often made something to serve over rice in our Crock Pot and then cooked the rice in the Instant Pot, for example.

If you’re looking primarily for something to just put stuff in and walk away in the morning and then come home to dinner in the evening, I’d get that Crock Pot I linked to above. It’s inexpensive and ours has worked flawlessly for a decade or so.

Q6: Home ownership challenge

I’m a 55 year old disabled woman with a home site on the Navajo Reservation and very low income…I’m looking for help in building a 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms house on my home site asap please.. I don’t have any collateral or any cash for down payment but willing to do low monthly payment to pay off.
– Sheila

My first suggestion for you would be to seek out assistance in getting a loan. Given your situation – your relative age and disability – you may have difficulty getting a loan through traditional means. However, both your tribal membership and your disability might make you eligible for programs that would help you get a loan anyway.

I would start by talking to tribal leaders about what programs are available for building on the reservation. They should be able to at least point you toward appropriate resources.

You may also be eligible for a HUD Section 8 loan for building a small home. I would contact your disability benefits office and ask about their home loans and grants.

Those resources should be able to help you build a modest home without overwhelming debt. Good luck!

Q7: Clearing out book collection

I have several shelves of books and one day I just realized I will probably never read 99% of them again and they’ll just sit there until I die. I would like to get at least a little money in return for them. What is the best way to do that?
– Denise

It depends on a few things. You may be able to donate them to the library, who may put them in circulation or sell them at a book sale. In those situations, the library usually estimates their value and gives you a receipt for them, which you can then use as a tax deduction. This is the easiest route and will save you some money if you’re already filing long form (if you have a mortgage and claim mortgage interest, you probably are; if not, you’re probably not unless you’re fairly wealthy).

If that doesn’t sound like it applies to you, you could make a long list of the books and put them up on Craigslist along with a photo of your shelves. You probably won’t get a lot for them that way, but it’ll be cash in your pocket. You’d want to price them somewhere in the range of $1 a book, with a discount if a bunch are purchased at once. You could also have a yard sale with a similar pricing scheme.

You can also take them to a local used bookstore, who may give you a small amount for them. This is probably a good approach for whatever’s left after selling via Craigslist.

If you wanted to invest more time, you could sell them via the Amazon Marketplace. You can sell them individually yourself, but it’ll be a lot of work to package and ship each book individually. A better approach might be to send all of your books to Amazon and have them do the work, but you’ll make substantially less by doing that. This would probably put the most money in your pocket, but it would also probably be the most work.

Personally, I’d donate them to the library if I were eligible to actually use the tax deduction from the donation.

Q8: Saving money on work trip

I was recently promoted at work, which means that I am supposed to travel for about a week once a month to visit installations. We receive a per diem bonus to cover food and fuel and incidentals and our airline ticket and rental car is already paid for, but when we’re actually there we have to buy our own food and stuff. Any suggestions on how to keep this cheap?
– David

Before you go, try to ensure that the hotel you’re staying at has a fridge in the room. This is an enormous money saver.

Put an empty water bottle and some granola bars in your carry on. Fill up the water bottle as soon as you’re through security. Eat the granola bars and drink the water instead of eating in the airport.

As soon as you’re at the location and have your car, stop at a grocery store and load up. Make sure that your room has a fridge, and then buy stuff to make simple meals at the hotel. Get stuff for lunches and dinners – things like sandwiches are perfect for this.

Take advantage of the continental breakfast at your hotel. Eat plenty, then snag a few extra fruits for snacks throughout the day. Use your water bottle throughout the day when you’re traveling.

If you do those things, you’ll keep the costs of traveling pretty low. Food is one of the biggest expenses while traveling, and if you can eliminate even half of the restaurant stops, you’ll save a ton of money.

Q9: Afraid of culture when moving

I have lived my entire life in and around New York, attended public school here, went to college here, so on. I have an amazing job offer in Des Moines, which immediately made me think of your site, which I have enjoyed reading off and on for years. I am mostly concerned about culture. As I am sure you know, Des Moines and other cities in the Midwest except maybe Chicago have the rep of being a cultural wasteland and there is nothing to do there. I’ve looked at Des Moines and found some promising things but I still can’t shake the idea that it is just three buildings in the middle of a cornfield. I guess I’m writing so you can convince me that it will all be okay.
– Stephen

I’m one of those people that feels pretty happy wherever I live. I’m fine living in cities. I’m fine living in small towns. I’m fine living in the country with no one else in sight. There are always things to do, no matter where I’m at. I’ve had great friends when I’ve lived in a city, when I’ve lived in the country, and when I’ve lived in a small town.

I guess I’m not sure what you mean by “cultural wasteland.” Often, that term seems to mean “a place devoid of things that I like.” Some people like a vibrant restaurant scene, so if they go to a place without a large quantity of independent unique restaurants, they identify it as a “cultural wasteland.” The same goes with art, or with music, or with people of different cultures. Some people define it as any area with a sufficient number of chain stores or restaurants.

For me, I think culture is mostly what you make of it. It’s about the people you seek out and choose to surround yourself with. The internet has made it easy to find communities and subcultures that match your interests and desires. Des Moines is large enough that you will be able to find a subculture devoted to pretty much anything you wish. There is a small but very vibrant music scene with a number of great bands and a solid annual music festival. There’s a surprisingly good restaurant scene – it’s not enormous, but you can find an interesting place to eat in the greater Des Moines area every day for a year without a repeat.

I guess the answer to your question is that Des Moines is big enough to have what you’re looking for if you’re willing to look for it. Granted, such communities probably won’t be as large as, say, the NYC dining scene, but the communities here aren’t nearly as segmented, either.

I’d say go for it. Give it an open mind, seek out communities related to your interests, and see what happens. If all else fails, you can always leverage that great job and move back to NYC.

Q10: Is my cell service overpriced?

How do you even tell if you’re paying too much for cell phone service? I know you can look at offers from other companies but their service is very different from place to place.
– Dana

So, here’s what I suggest. Go to OpenSignal and see what the signal looks like for different carriers in the places where you are most of the time – your home, your commute, your workplace, your common shopping locations, any places you visit frequently, and so on.

Basically, don’t even bother with companies that appear to have a lot of poor coverage in those areas. Don’t even try to compare them.

Instead, look at the carriers with good coverage in those areas. Visit each one of their websites and see what plans they offer that match your actual usage. If they’re cheaper than your plan, consider switching or using the other plan to negotiate with your current carrier.

So, for example, in my area, OpenSignal reveals that US Cellular and Verizon are good, but T-Mobile and Sprint are pretty sketchy. So, I’m mostly going to look at US Cellular and Verizon for offers, as the quality drop-off after those two is pretty steep.

That’s the general strategy I follow. (I only consider pay-as-you-go providers if they use the Verizon or US Cellular networks – ones that use Sprint or T-Mobile won’t work for me.)

Q11: Buying long lasting denim jeans

What are some tricks for buying jeans that will last for a long time? The ones I buy always seem to fall apart and rip.
– David

OK, first trick – don’t wash your jeans unless they’re actually dirty. When you take them off, inspect them. Do you see dirt or other smudges? Are there any noticeable odors? If so, then wash them. If not, then don’t wash them. Seriously, people wash clothes far too often and it is very hard on them. Wash clothes if they’re dirty. A pair of jeans you wear on a lazy day are probably not dirty.

The most long-lasting jeans I’ve ever owned are work jeans from Carhartt, like these. They last and last and last and last.

Having said that, different brands change their manufacture pretty regularly, so you’re going to want to inspect them. Generally, darker denim that feels stiffer to the touch in the store is going to last longer, because when denim feels softer and more flexible, that means it’s been washed, usually with bleach and other chemicals, that have broken down the fibers, meaning the jeans won’t last as long. Stiff jeans take some time to break in, but they last a lot longer.

Check the stitching everywhere and skip any jeans where the stitching looks uneven. Compare jeans of different types and choose the ones with more stitching, as they’re less likely to fail along the seams.

Yeah, it takes a little time, but you’ll walk out with jeans that will last for a long time.

Q12: Sourdough starter advice

When I was a kid, my grandma kept sourdough starter in a little crock on her counter. Each day or two, she’d take some of it and make bread, then add flour and water to what was left.

I’d like to start doing the same thing. I have read a lot about it but I am still unsure about what I am doing and want to know if there is a cheap/easy way to get started. I want some sourdough bread like grandma made!
– Virginia

All you really need is a big wide mouth jar with a lid, some flour, a wooden spoon, and some water. By big, I mean at least a quart jar, and preferably a bigger one. That’s really all you need to get this going.

Take 3/4 cup flour – whatever kind you like and add 1/2 cup warm water and mix them together in the jar. This should end up being a very very soft dough – add a little water if it’s not almost runny. Put the lid on loosely (so air can escape from the inside) and leave it on your countertop overnight.

The next day, add another 3/4 cup flour and 1/2 cup water. You may notice some bubbling in the dough, or maybe not. Either way, it’s okay at that point. Stir in the water and flour, put the lid back on, and wait another day.

On the third day, remove about half of the starter and toss it. You should notice that there’s quite a bit of bubbling going on in there – that’s fine – and it might even have a hint of a sourdough-y smell. That’s good. Don’t panic if it’s not quite there yet. Then, again, add 3/4 cup flour and 1/2 cup water, stir it, cover it loosely, and let it sit for another day.

Repeat this each day. Remove half the starter, add 3/4 cup flour and 1/2 cup water, stir thoroughly, cover. Each day, it should seem more and more and more like sourdough in terms of the aroma. It’ll probably get runnier, too. That’s all normal.

After about a week of this, you should have sourdough starter. You have to keep feeding it every day or two after that, which is what you should be doing if you want to bake every day or two. On days when you want to bake, remove half the starter and then use that removed portion to bake with, following a sourdough bread recipe.

What if you want to take a break or if you want to travel? Move the whole container to the fridge. You only need to feed it once a week when it’s in there, but the process is the same – remove half the starter, add 1/2 cup water, add 3/4 cup flour, stir, put lid back on loosely. That’s really all there is to it.

You can buy starters that allow you to skip the first several days of this process, but after that, you need to keep feeding it like this.

Got any questions? The best way to ask is to follow me on Facebook and ask questions directly there. I’ll attempt to answer them in a future mailbag (which, by way of full disclosure, may also get re-posted on other websites that pick up my blog). However, I do receive many, many questions per week, so I may not necessarily be able to answer yours.

The post Questions About Babies, Houses, Jeans, Taxes, Sourdough, and More! appeared first on The Simple Dollar.

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New SARP chief: 'Let's work together'

EAST STROUDSBURG — Jennifer Lyon remembers the state trooper who lived near her family's farm when she was growing up in Bethel Township."He used to stop in to check on us," Lyon said. "He was a great guy and did all the right things and was so caring. He told stories about his job and about helping people."I wanted to be like him," she said. "I wanted to help people and make a difference in the world."And that's what motivated Lyon toward the career in which she [...]

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Harvey and Irma’s Used Car Lot: How to Avoid the Flood-Damaged Car Scam

Hurricanes Harvey and Irma were catastrophic for parts of the southern United States. In some places, Harvey released more than 50 inches of rain, and, overall, the hurricane dumped an estimated total of 30 trillion gallons of water throughout the U.S. Irma was similarly devastating, dropping nearly 16 inches of rain in Florida, with gusts reaching 142 miles per hour.

As the tens of thousands of affected people begin to rebuild their lives, the automotive market is in a state of disarray. According to Edmunds’ Jessica Caldwell, an estimated 366,000 new vehicles were destroyed on dealership lots in Texas, which is responsible for 9% of automotive retail sales in the U.S. This will likely put a dent in the profitability of the auto industry, which employs roughly 7.25 million Americans; for August, overall US auto sales decreased by 1.9%, largely due to Harvey.

Adding to this disarray, Cox Automotive estimates that 500,000 vehicles were damaged by flooding due to Harvey and another 200,000 to 400,000 were claimed by Irma, which will put just as many drivers in the market for replacement vehicles in the coming weeks. An increase in demand, as Economics 101 has taught us, will likely lead to increased used car prices for Harvey and Irma victims looking to make a fresh start.

The other unfortunate implication is that 700,000 to 900,000 flood-damaged vehicles could enter the used car market; some sellers will illegally try to pass these off as vehicles that have not been flood-damaged by obtaining new vehicle titles (called “title washing”).

While it is not clear how many cars were title-washed after Katrina and Sandy, a 2014 study from Carfax indicates that nearly 800,000 vehicles in the U.S. could be title-washed. It is telling, however, that the state with the highest number of potentially title-washed cars was New Jersey (77,096), just two years after the Garden State was devastated by Sandy.

That makes it crucial for used car shoppers — Harvey and Irma victims or otherwise — to be on high alert for signs of flood-damaged vehicles in the coming months. Below are tips to avoid purchasing a car that has been damaged by flood waters, particularly in the wake of Harvey and Irma.

How to Avoid Buying a Flood-Damaged Used Car

Buy from Reputable Dealers.

To avoid being swindled into purchasing a flood-damaged used car, your safest bet is to buy from a trusted dealership. These dealers have a reputation to uphold and will likely provide you with a detailed vehicle history report.

Get the Vehicle History Report

Edmunds recommends getting a Carfax vehicle history report if you suspect flood damage.

A vehicle history report will include tons of relevant information, like states in which the car has been registered. Edmunds also recommends a cheap ($7 or less) report from the National Motor Vehicle Title Information System, which will detail whether the car has been salvaged, among other key points.

You should also use the National Insurance Crime Bureau’s (NCIB) VINCheck℠ to compare a used car’s VIN against a database of cars that have been totaled (including due to flood damage).

Trust Your Senses, but Also a Mechanic’s

When you are inspecting a potential used car, be on the lookout for the following:

• Foul odors, particularly mold and mildew. These smells can signal that a car has been in standing water for a prolonged amount of time.

• Discolored carpeting or rusted metal. Stains in carpeting or seat fabrics are also indicators of standing water. Rust on the body or the undercarriage is a sign of excessive water exposure, particularly in newer cars.

• Inexplicable dirt build-up, like in the trunk or along the seat tracks. This is a sign that mud got into places where muddy feet typically do not travel.

• Water build-up in headlights and taillights. Fogginess in the lighting can also be a sign of prolonged water exposure.

• Mismatching parts, like seat materials compared to floor mats. A clever seller may replace a damaged floor mat, hoping you won’t notice that it isn’t a perfect match to the other mats or the seat fabric.

For added precaution, have a trusted mechanic give the vehicle a once-over before you sign on the dotted line. Avoid any seller who is uncomfortable with you taking the car to a mechanic.

If you do suspect a dealership or private seller of knowingly selling a flood-damaged vehicle, contact your local authorities or the NCIB immediately.

In the aftermath of Hurricane Harvey and Hurricane Irma, many in our nation are in great need. Find out how you can help provide relief, even if money is tight. Just be aware of scammers — they exist outside the used car market too.

Timothy Moore has written for the automotive industry for five years. He works as an editor and writer in Nashville.

This was originally published on The Penny Hoarder, one of the largest personal finance websites. We help millions of readers worldwide earn and save money by sharing unique job opportunities, personal stories, freebies and more. In 2016, Inc. 500 ranked The Penny Hoarder as the No. 1 fastest-growing private media company in the U.S.

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Are You Ready for a Stock Market Crash?

I’m not in the business of predicting stock market crashes. Plenty of so-called financial experts have died on that hill and I have no intention of joining them.

I don’t know what the stock market is going to do today, tomorrow, next year, or any other year. Your guess is as good as mine.

But I do know two things:

1. We’ve had eight straight years of positive stock market returns. And as of this writing, the year-to-date return for 2017 is 11.93%, so it looks like that streak will stretch to nine years.
2. There will eventually be a stock market crash. I don’t know when or how big it will be, but it will happen.

Put those together and you get a lot of investors who’ve experienced nothing but growth for a long time, and who could be in for a big shock when the crash eventually comes.

I don’t want that to be you. I want you to be fearless, but prepared, so that you can take the next stock market crash in stride and stay on track toward your long-term goals.

To do that, you need a plan. Here’s how to make it.

1. Know That a Stock Market Crash Is Coming

Every time there’s a stock market crash, people act like it’s the end of the world. Like they’ve never seen anything like it before. Like it was totally unexpected.

But stock market crashes are not unexpected. They’re a normal part of the investment cycle.

The stock market lost 36.55% in 2008 (source). It lost 9.03% in 2000, 11.85% in 2001, and 21.97% in 2002. It lost 25.90% in 1974. It lost 35.34% in 1937. It lost 8.30% in 1929 before losing 25.12% in 1930 and another 43.84% in 1931.

The only thing that’s strange about a stock market crash is people acting like it’s strange.

Don’t be that person. Understand that stock market crashes are normal and expect that, at some point, you are going to lose a lot of money in the stock market.

Then, when it happens, you can react rationally instead of losing your mind like everyone else.

2. Know That a Recovery Is Coming Right Behind It

Even when you know it’s coming, a stock market crash is hard to stomach. Day after day you watch all that money you’ve worked so hard to save disappear, without any idea when it will end or how far it will go.

It’s tough. It really is.

But here’s the thing: the stock market has always recovered. Sometimes it’s taken years, but it has always come back even stronger than it was before.

Here’s the proof (source):

This chart shows the growth of the stock market from 1900-2014. It’s pretty easy to see the relentless trend upward.

Every crash is followed by a recovery. Which means that if you stick with it, you’ll be rewarded.

3. Choose an Asset Allocation That Expects Both Crashes and Recoveries

There’s no sense in trying to predict when these crashes and recoveries will occur.

If you could do it, and if you could get in and out of the stock market at the exact right times, you’d get rich beyond your wildest dreams.

But no one in history has been able to do it with any consistency, so the very idea is nothing more than a pipe dream.

What you can do is a lot less exciting, but also a lot more effective. You can select an asset allocation that expects both crashes and recoveries and prepares you for both.

At its core, your asset allocation is how you choose to divide your money between high-risk, high-return investments like stocks, and low-risk, low-return investments like bonds. The balance you choose affects both the potential returns you can earn, and the risk you take on.

Here’s how to think about it in the context of preparing for both a stock market crash and recovery:

Your bonds provide a cushion during a stock market crash. This portion of your portfolio should, at worst, lose a lot less than the stocks in your portfolio.

Your stocks provide growth during the subsequent recovery. This is what allows you to earn your money back and then some.

Both are important to have in your portfolio, and your job is to choose a balance that both feels right and lines up with your personal investment goals.

A reasonable rule of thumb is to expect that 50% of whatever you have invested in stocks could disappear during a market crash. You would, of course, expect it to recover and then some over the subsequent years, but you can use that guideline to help you figure out just how much you’re comfortable risking.

4. Plan to Rebalance

When the stock market does crash, your asset allocation will naturally shift out of balance. You’ll have a lower portion of your portfolio in stocks than you intended, simply because your stocks have lost more value.

For example, let’s say that you have $100,000 invested and you have a target asset allocation of 70% stocks and 30% bonds. That means you’d have $70,000 invested in stocks and $30,000 invested in bonds.

Now let’s say that a market crash causes a 30% drop in the stock market, while the bond market remains flat. After that crash, you would still have $30,000 invested in bonds but you’d only have $49,000 in stocks. Which means that your asset allocation would have shifted to 62% stocks and 38% bonds.

In order to get back to your target asset allocation, you’d have to sell $6,300 of your bonds and use it to buy more stocks. That’s right, you’d have to buy into the stock market at the exact moment that it’s in the middle of crashing.

That can be nerve-wracking, but that is the essence of rebalancing. And it’s a necessary part of your investment plan because it keeps you from getting too far out of balance during both the bad times and the good times.

And it’s especially effective during a market crash because you are essentially buying stocks on sale, which puts you in position to benefit even more from the subsequent recovery.

So plan to rebalance at least once per year, whether the stock market is high or low. Your investments will thank you.

5. Write Down Your Plan and Commit to It

Your plan is only as good as your ability to stick to it.

An investment policy statement will help you do just that. This document can be kept very simple, but essentially you are detailing the following:

• Your investment goals
• How much money you plan on investing
• Which accounts you will be contributing to
• Your target asset allocation
• Your rebalancing policy

Then, at the bottom, you can sign and date your commitment to this plan. And when the stock market starts to crash and you start feeling nervous, you can pull out this document, review your plan, review your commitment to it, and know exactly how to stay on track.

Handle the Next Stock Market Crash Like a Pro

Real investors know that a stock market crash is coming. They know that they can’t predict when it will happen or how big it will be, but they are ready for it nonetheless.

If you follow the steps above, you’ll be ready for it too.

Related Articles:

• Why You’re Guaranteed to Lose Money in the Stock Market – and Why That’s OK
• How to Handle a Stock Market Slump
• Diversification: The Only Free Lunch in Investing

Matt Becker, CFP® is a fee-only financial planner and the founder of Mom and Dad Money, where he helps new parents take control of their money so they can take care of their families. His free book, The New Family Financial Road Map, guides parents through the all most important financial decisions that come with starting a family.

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Turns Out, Millennials Are More Likely to Get Scammed Than Your Grandma

We all know the stereotype: Your grandparents aren’t tech smart, so they’d likely fall victim to fraud on the internet, right? No.

As it turns out, it’s millennials, the ones who are super-savvy about all things technology and social media, that are most likely to be duped by online scammers.

That’s right — according to a recent report by the Better Business Bureau, 37% of people aged 18 to 24 were more susceptible to fraud compared to only 12% of seniors over 65. That said, when seniors were duped they lost almost twice the amount of money as millennials.

What gives?

Risky Business

There are two types of fraud that disproportionately affect 18- to 24-year-olds: employment and fake-check scams.

Employment scams vary, but they usually include fake employment postings, phony recruiters who email you a job listing or an ad for a work-from-home job.  

Often, these imposters are downright convincing – they claim to represent legitimate companies or government agencies over the phone. They seem legit, and you let your guard down.

After a phone interview — or sometimes no interview — they say you are hired. Then you are told to fill out an online application that includes a lot of personal information, like your Social Security number and bank details, which they can later use for identity theft.

They may also tell you that before you can start killing it at your work-from-home job selling product X, you’ll have to purchase training manuals upfront. You send the money, but the manuals never show up. You are out the money, and the job never existed. Ouch.

The BBB gives some smart tips on what to look out for in employment scams, including being wary of any job that has a broad title such as secret shopper, caregiver or customer service rep.

You’ll also want to double-check any positions on the company’s official website to make sure they’re legit. Look online. If the job comes up in a number of cities it is most likely fraudulent, according to the BBB.

If you are victim to this type of scam, contact the BBB Scam Tracker which lists all recently reported scams in the US.

Check Mate

Check scams can vary, but the scammer generally gives you a phony check to deposit and asks you to return an overpayment. Then the phony check bounces.

Money-wiring scams are also prevalent — even I was targeted once. A Facebook acquaintance said she was in France and her wallet was stolen, and asked me to wire her money?  

I almost fell for it until I reached her by phone in New York. I later learned someone hacked her Facebook account.

Another variation on this theme is when you are contacted by mail, phone or email and told you have won a foreign lottery. To receive the cashier’s check for your winnings, all you need to do is wire money to a foreign account to pay for the taxes and fees.

You wire the money and wait. And wait. Of course, you never receive your supposed lottery winnings, and the wired money is long gone by the time you figure it out.

Whenever you are contacted, whether it’s by phone, text, social media or mail, never act impulsively. Verify who you’re communicating with by contacting the person via alternate means, or researching them or their company online. Usually a scam has been repeated in other places.

Throw away any offer that asks you to pay for something upfront and never get pressured into wiring money to an unknown party.

Fraud Busters

So, what can you do to protect yourself?

First, realize fraud can happen to you. Scammers rely on you feeling invincible and making impulsive decisions.

If you feel unsure about something, check with family or friends before giving money to someone you don’t know. If you are contacted by text or messenger – even by someone you know – you should always try to reach that person by phone to make sure their need is legit.

Do a search online for the name or telephone number of someone who has approached you if they seem even slightly dubious. Often you will find complaints from others to validate your negative vibes. The BBB Scam Tracker is a fantastic resource and a great way to educate yourself on just how devious scammers can get.

Keep your personal information secure. Check places like the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau or the Better Business Bureau to learn about the latest scams and how you can protect yourself.

Don’t share your personal information with people you don’t know whether that’s online, on the phone or in person.

You should also request a free credit report once a year from annualcreditreport.com to check for any suspicious activity. If someone is impersonating you, this is where you will likely find out.

I’ve Been Scammed, Now What?

Report the scam to the Federal Trade Commission (FTC) and BBB Scam Tracker (BBB). While you may not be able to get your money back, law enforcement can act upon complaints in the FTC and BBB databases when there are enough details. You should also file a report with your local police department.

If you are the victim of identity theft, put a fraud alert on your credit report, immediately. To do this, contact one of the three credit bureaus: TransUnion, Equifax or Experian.  The bureau you contact is required to contact the other two. A fraud alert is free and lasts 90 days. If needed, mark your calendar to place a new alert after 90 days.

Immediately change your passwords to smart passwords with a combination of random letters, numbers and characters. Then remember to change them again every three months moving forward.

The internet makes it more difficult than ever to know who you are really dealing with. Always resist the urge to react impulsively. Do your research and verify the identity of anyone who asks you for money. After all, you know what they say about an ounce of prevention.

Doria Lavagnino is the co-founder and president of CentSai, a financial wellness platform for millennials and Gen X and CentSaiAdulting, for teachers and teens. Before launching  CentSai she was an editor at Glamour magazine.

This was originally published on The Penny Hoarder, one of the largest personal finance websites. We help millions of readers worldwide earn and save money by sharing unique job opportunities, personal stories, freebies and more. In 2016, Inc. 500 ranked The Penny Hoarder as the No. 1 fastest-growing private media company in the U.S.

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How This Pittsburgh Mom Became a Best-Selling Romance Author

Rachel Blaufeld is a bestselling author of Romantic Suspense, New Adult, Coming-of-Age Women’s Fiction & Romance, and Sports Romance. Originally a social worker, Rachel creates broken yet redeeming characters. She’s been known to turn up the angst like cranking up the heat in the dead of winter. Blaufeld is also a long-time blogger and an […]

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County, public remained in dark about big methane leak

One night in early September, a critical piece of natural gas infrastructure temporarily blew its stack.By the time a resident heard the racket, dialed 911 and workers responded, the Harmony compressor station in rural northeastern Pennsylvania had spewed more than twice as much natural gas into the air as a typical compressor station does in a year.Yet the Sept. 2 leak was not made public by any state agency or by the company itself. The Associated Press learned of it during a [...]

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Local business briefs, Monday, Sept. 25, 2017

Weichert affiliated offices in the Tannersville area welcome new team membersWeichert affiliated offices in the Tannersville area have recently added the following individuals to their team: Timothy Christopher Audett and Christina M. Weidinger, join a dedicated team of knowledgeable agents at Weichert, Realtors - Acclaim, at 2920 Route 611, Tannersville. Information: Charles Marzzacco at 570-629-6100 or charlie@acclaimrealty.com.Each Weichert franchised office [...]

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PM East teacher one of 10 to receive prestigious award

Walking into a room full of students laughing with each other and playing games on a computer might be enough to give a normal teacher fits, but for Robert Luciano that’s just what he wants to see.Luciano has been Pocono Mountain East’s computer science teacher for two decades and has revolutionized an unsuccessful program into of the district’s crown jewels.“I get them hooked on it and that’s the whole thing,” Luciano said. “We [...]

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Pa. reps work toward new vehicle stickers

License plate stickers may be making a comeback in Pennsylvania, but in a more improved version.Two state representatives are working on reintroducing legislation to reinstitute the stickers, which showed whether a vehicle’s registration was up to date.State Reps. Barry Jozwiak, R-5, of Berks County — the first state trooper to be elected to the House of Representatives — and Dom Costa, D-21, of Allegheny County, are drafting legislation that for the first [...]

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A Frugal Wedding Adventure, Part 3: The Big Day and the Final Numbers

A few weeks ago, I got married in rural Wisconsin, in the backyard of the house in which my wife grew up. The following morning, after the parties had ended and the out-of-towners had left, I found myself taking a walk through the quiet streets of the town, past endless corn fields and quaint red farmhouses. I stopped at one point and looked out over the landscape of rolling hills and lush greenery, and I noticed the home of my new in-laws peeking out in the distance. I was moved to tears.

Not just because that was the house where I formed a sacred bond with the love of my life, but because I had a moment to reflect on the whole process, and all that brought it into existence. I was proud of the work my wife and I put in, for sure, but much moreso for our families and friends, whose tireless effort made it all happen. Without them, there is no way we could have had such a wonderful party with so many people for such an affordable price.

But, of course, there were some bumps along the way, some unexpected costs, and a desperate attempt to find a new pair of shoelaces minutes before the ceremony. Here’s how it all played out.

The Money

I can wax poetic about the twinkle in my wife’s eye while walking down the aisle, or the beauty of seeing our families meet for the first time, or the heartwarming toasts, but, let’s be real — those would all be just a smidge less satisfying if the party was costing us more than a year in rent (remember, the average wedding in the U.S. now costs over $35,000).

All those moments were enjoyed guilt-free because we miraculously came in just barely over our $2,500 budget. Here is the rough breakdown of how we got to our final number of $2,950:

Food

We had generous support in this area. It’s hard to feed 140 people. One uncle’s employer ended up footing the cost of a massive cheeseboard (Wisconsin advantage!) and another bargained with a local butcher to get our meat at a steep discount. My wife also had a restaurant connection, which allowed us to purchase smaller ticket items at discounted prices.

• Total: $1,100

Drinks

We only provided beer and wine. My mother-in-law spent eight months finding insane deals and stockpiling the goods in her basement.

• Total: $750

Guest Transportation

Since my in-laws’ house is in a fairly remote area, accommodations for out-of-town guests were about 15 miles from the party. We wanted to provide transportation to ensure all of our guests were safe in an area they were unfamiliar with.

• Total: $400

Decorations and Tents

There was a huge DIY aspect here, and we borrowed a tent from a member of the extended family.

• Total: $300

Clothes

It was a casual wedding, but we both still wanted to look sharp. I purchased a new button shirt and slacks, and my wife bought a casual dress. The good thing is that these are staple clothes that we can use for years to come.

Total: $400

Catering, Setup, and Cleanup

Family and friends pitched in for all of this.

• Total: $0.00

The Community to the Rescue

You probably noticed a trend in the way we were able to keep our spending down. We had family and friends working tirelessly for us. It seemed like every time we hit a roadblock, there was someone from the local community helping us to find a solution. We didn’t get huge monetary gifts from anyone, but many people were beyond generous with their time and resources. We wouldn’t have had it any other way.

My wife grew up in a small, tightly knit community. And she has a lot of family and friends who still live there. As word got out about the type of wedding we were planning, we pretty much couldn’t stop people from helping. Saying no would have been foolish, and probably even offensive. Someone they loved was getting married, it was happening right around the corner from them, and they were going to pitch in whether we liked it or not.

Amazingly, none of this came with strings attached. There was no Aunt Linda demanding that she be able to give a 15-minute toast if she was going to help us string lights in the garage. Everything was done with a smile.

Instead of shelling out $400 for a second shuttle, we limited ourselves to one, and leaned on some aunts and uncles to pick up out-of-towners on their way to the party. Instead of hiring a catering crew, my brother-in-law painstakingly planned out every detail and recruited help from family and friends the morning of to get all the food in order.

Most amazingly, the cleanup crew was whoever was left at the end of the night. As the music died down, people naturally started to gather trash and clean off the tables. Chairs were rearranged and tables were stacked. It was like the college frat parties I used to go to, except the exact opposite.

I understand that, in some ways, I’m saying, “Rely on the support of an amazing family and community and you can have a cheap wedding!” That is not helpful advice. Some people are not lucky enough to have those advantages. But if you are doing a DIY wedding, and you are in any way tied into the community in which it is being thrown, I would just say to not be afraid to ask for help. You’d be surprised at just how generous people will be with their time.

The Planning Fallacy Strikes Back

In the previous installment of this series, I was discussing the planning fallacy, and how it had impacted wedding preparations for my wife and me. As a quick refresher, the planning fallacy refers to the fact that many things, from construction projects to getting ready in the morning, tend to take longer than people think they will.

Originally, tasks were taking a lot longer than I had anticipated, and I was determined to plan accordingly going forward. Essentially, that meant doubling the expected time I originally thought things would take. If we were going to pull off a frugal backyard wedding, we were going to have to put in a lot of sweat equity and block out extra time for even small tasks.

Unfortunately, I am proving to be pretty poor at combatting the planning fallacy. Despite knowing about it, despite bringing it up in talks with my wife, despite writing a whole article about it… I got bit by it.

There was no cataclysm, but the few days leading up to the wedding were a stressful whirlwind. I know, I know, that’s how everyone feels, but I think I was particularly slammed. Time was flying by so fast I got whiplash. One day I’m power washing the deck, the next I’m scrambling to the mall because it’s a day before the party and I don’t even have my outfit picked out.

If we had set aside a few more days for preparation, things could have run much more smoothly. Leading up to the wedding, people would tell me to take the amount of money I thought I was going to spend and triple it. “That’s what always happens,” they’d tell me. While we avoided that fate, I would give similar advice to the newly engaged, especially those who are not hiring a wedding planner: “Take the amount of time you think things will take, and triple it.” That might seem extreme, but it would have greatly reduced my stress if I just accepted the fact that things would take a whole lot longer than I realized.

Summing Up

I started this series in order to showcase our frugality. I wanted to show how my wife and I would optimize every aspect of the big day, finding unique and clever ways to save money while still having the party of our lives. That is still part of the intent, and I’m proud of what we accomplished in that regard. My wife was a DIY superstar, and we both worked hard on everything from creating labels for the buffet to setting up tents.

Most importantly, after seeing how it all came into being, I’ve seen that there is no “hack” that tops having family and community support, and building strong social ties. Despite a mad rush to get everything set up, and a passing rain cloud surprisingly dumping some water on our outdoor ceremony, the day was a total success. Coming in under budget, and having some leftovers to take home, was icing on the cake.

Related Articles:

• Married Millennials Merging Money: How and Why We’re Combining Our Finances
• 10 Pieces of Financial Advice for Newly Married Couples
• 20 Ideas for a Frugal (Not Cheap) Wedding on a Budget

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How Meatless Mondays Can Cut Your Grocery Budget and Keep Your Family Healthy

Marriott and Starwood Offer Fan-tastic NFL Experiences

Last week, Marriott International announced the kickoff of their 2018 Courtyard Super Bowl Sleepover Contest. The contest gives one lucky fan the opportunity to wake up on the field of Super Bowl LII after spending the night in a field-level suite converted into a Courtyard guestroom. Contest winners will enjoy in-stadium experiences and exclusive events throughout the Super Bowl weekend, all leading up to the game itself.

Entering is simple — all fans have to do is post their most unique NFL fan photos on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram using the hashtag #CourtyardSuperBowlContest. The deadline is November 3rd.

But this year, Marriott’s announced something new: If you’re in the Flatiron District of NYC on September 28th, you’ll be able to experience an Ultra High-Tech 4D Virtual Reality Dome Experience – and feel like you’re standing on the field at the Super Bowl stadium.

Marriott Rewards and Starwood Preferred Guest offer experiences year-round

But and (both on our list of the best hotel cards for 2017) cardholders aren’t just limited to Super Bowl weekend for exclusive sports rewards. By visiting Marriott Rewards Moments or SPG® Moments, cardholders can use their points to bid on epic NFL experiences over the entire season.

Starwood Preferred Guest members can bid on seats to see the Minnesota Vikings play in the heart of London (bidding ends Oct. 10). Packers fans can use Marriott Rewards to bid on the ultimate Green Bay package, including on-field passes, a $100 Packers Team Shop gift card, and the chance to meet with an NFL legend (bidding ends Oct 17).

Using rewards to show team spirit

If you’re a holder, you earn 5X points at participating properties, including Marriott Rewards®, The Ritz-Carlton®, and Starwood Preferred Guest® hotels. These are combined with unlimited 2X points on tickets directly from airlines, car rental agencies, and restaurants, as well as unlimited 1X points from all other purchases.

It’s easy for rewards to stack up, and if this is your first year of card ownership, spending $3,000 on purchases in your first three months earns cardholders an 80,000-point signup bonus. Also, if you add an authorized user, and make a purchase within your first three months, you’ll earn an extra 7,500 points.

cardholders earn 2X Starpoints® at participating SPG® and Marriott Rewards® hotels, as well as 1 Starpoint® with all other purchases. Spend $3,000 on purchases within your first three months of card ownership, and you’ll be able to earn 25,000 bonus Starpoints®.

Both cards offer high rewards rates and signup bonuses that put a healthy chunk towards a bid for exclusive experiences. So, grab your jersey, and use rewards to fund an unforgettable game day.

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Fan-tastic NFL Experiences appeared first on The Simple Dollar.

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Pennsylvania's ugly budget fight runs into Amazon courtship

HARRISBURG (AP) — Mass transit system? Check. Big population center? Check. Top-notch universities? Check. Predictable state government with a top-notch credit rating?Pennsylvania business boosters and economic development professionals couldn't help noticing this week that state government got slapped with another credit downgrade amid an ugly budget stalemate just as officials in the Philadelphia and Pittsburgh regions are polishing their resumes to try to land the golden [...]

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Straight Talk on 10 Common Personal Finance and Career Issues

In a typical week, I hear from 20 to 30 readers by email or social media. Typically, the 12 most interesting questions make it into the reader mailbag.

What about the other 10 or so questions?

The honest truth is that most of those other questions boil down to the same handful of questions, over and over, with minor variations.

Today, I’m going to answer the 10 most common issues in the most straightforward manner that I can. Before I get started, though, two caveats:

One, your situation might seem special, but it usually isn’t. The core principles of personal finance and careers come around again and again because they work in almost every situation. Your situation is rarely an exception. People often want to believe that their situation is an exception because they want it to be an exception, one that will let them violate common sense. Almost always, it isn’t.

Two, most of the solutions I’m focusing on are things you can actually do to fix your problem, and many of those solutions are in your head. Mindset is a huge part of personal and professional success. Again and again, you choose how you tackle problems. You choose what aspects to dwell on and which ones to gloss over. My answers are all focused on two areas: action and mindset.

Let’s get started.

I Hate My Job

Here’s the truth: Most people hate their job sometimes. You don’t get paid for everything to be fun time all of the time; if it were fun time all of the time, it would be a hobby and you’d do it because it was fun.

Most jobs have a mix of good things and bad things. For one, you’re getting paid – that’s always a plus. You often have some tasks that you don’t mind doing and maybe even a few that you find interesting or enjoyable, and you probably have some coworkers that you don’t mind interacting with. On the other side of that, you’re spending time working that you might be using for other things. You might have some problematic coworkers. You might have some tasks that you don’t really enjoy.

The problem is that people tend to start dwelling on the negative parts of things and let them amplify until they drown out the positives. You can’t stand two out of 10 of your coworkers, but your mind keeps dwelling on that poison pair. You hate some of your work tasks, but they only take up an hour of your day if you compress them all together instead of dwelling on them.

So, people spend their time stewing over one or two coworkers and end up feeling like they hate all their coworkers, when many of them are perfectly fine and some of them might even be nascent friends. People put off and stew over a few tasks they really don’t like and the dread of those tasks poisons the whole day.

Want to know three big tips for not hating your job?

One, avoid people you don’t like. Just don’t spend time around them. Don’t eat where they do. Don’t engage in projects with them. Don’t worry about them. Let them do their thing and you do yours. Instead, focus on the people you do like. Consciously spend more time with the pleasant people at work. Eat with the quiet but friendly person in the break room. Try to get involved with projects with more pleasant folks.

Two, do all of the tasks you hate first thing in the morning. Do them as soon as you get there, and buckle down and focus until they’re done. That way, the dread of those tasks doesn’t poison the whole day. It’s 9 AM and that nasty task is already out of the way!

Three, recognize that everyone else feels these things, too, and if you hate your current job, it’s likely you hated other jobs and will hate future jobs unless you change. You decide whether you let a few difficult tasks or a bad coworker poison your entire work mindset or not. That’s your choice. It has nothing to do with the bad elements, because every job has bad elements. If you hate this job, it’s likely you’ll hate your next job, too. Rather than fixing the job, fix the hate.

Yes, there are some jobs that really are poisonous, but the reality is that most jobs aren’t that way. They’re just jobs. Jobs aren’t going to be purely fun – they’re going to have rough moments. However, jobs often have a lot of good things going for them, too. Focus on the good things – decent people, tasks you don’t mind doing, decent pay. Let the good things be your guide.

What you’ll find is that if you don’t dread your job, you’ll probably perform better there and build better relationships, and that will do nothing but help your career.

• Related: What to Do When a Job Becomes Miserable

I Want to Buy a House or Car That I Can’t Afford

Don’t buy that house or car you can’t afford.

If you budgeted a certain amount for a car or a house purchase and you’re trying to find some excuse to make it okay to spend more, the truth is that the only person you’re letting down is your future self. You’re handcuffing your future self by saying, “Guess what? You’re going to be throwing money hand over fist into this car or house? Say goodbye to a lot of the perks of your life!”

The only sensible way to shop for a major expense like a car or a house is to figure out how much money you can afford to spend first, before looking at anything, and then use that as a filter to see what you can even bother looking at. If you don’t like what you see, then keep saving.

Guess what? There are always going to be nicer cars and nicer houses than what’s in your price range. The people that manage to swing those nicer cars and nicer houses are sacrificing other things in their life – they’re tied to a high-pressure career or have huge expectations on their shoulders or are facing a hidden mountain of debt.

Don’t put yourself there. Don’t burden your life with an expense you can barely carry. You’re signing yourself up for a lot of misery by doing it.

Don’t ever buy that house or car that you can’t afford. It is a giant mistake.

• Related: Why You Should Buy Less House Than You Can Afford

I Want to Lend a Friend or Family Member Money

Don’t lend money to friends or family members.

I don’t care how much they need it. I don’t care how much you want to help.

No one likes their lender. No one feels happy warm positive feelings about making a mortgage payment. No one feels strongly affirmed in a relationship when the person lending them money insists on payment. No one feels great hanging out with the uncle that they “forgot” to pay back.

Debt between friends and family members is poison. It will haunt you forever unless they happen to miraculously subscribe to the perfect expectations you have for them in your mind – and they almost never do, if they’re in a situation where they’re borrowing from family members.

If you really, really, really want to financially help someone, make it a fully no-strings-attached gift that they never, ever have to pay back. Ever. This isn’t a secret hidden loan. This is a gift. They never have to pay you back.

That way, there is no burden of expectation. There is no relationship on the line. There is no family tension involved. Yes, you’ll be out that money. That’s okay.

• Related: Why Lending Money to Family is a Bad Idea

My Friend or Family Member Won’t Pay Back the Money They Owe Me

Either forgive them the debt or kiss the relationship – and possibly other relationships by domino effect – goodbye.

Right now, you’re speaking like a lender in a situation with a bad borrower. You’re not speaking like a friend or a family member.

You have to decide, right now – are you a lender interacting with a borrower, or are you a friend interacting with a friend?

You can’t have it both ways. One relationship is borne out of love. The other is borne out of contractual obligations. Love and contractual obligations don’t mix.

You can pursue this debt doggedly and probably eventually get paid back, but if you do that, you’ll almost assuredly have done irreparable damage to the friendship because you acted like a lender toward a bad borrower and that’s not an act of friendship.

On the other hand, you can just forgive the loan entirely and maintain the relationship. You will have learned something about that person, of course, but that doesn’t exclude a good friendship or familial relationship going forward.

You have to choose. It is exceedingly rare to have it both ways in a situation where a friend or family member is failing to pay you back in the expected way.

Are you a lender? Or are you a family member/friend?

I Can’t Afford to Pay My Bills

There are many, many paths to this conclusion. They all boil down to one thing.

You are spending more than you earn. You have to stop that.

“But I can’t!” Yes, you can. You’re just refusing to even consider a lot of the moves you might need to make to put yourself in a position where you’re spending less than you earn.

Sell your house and move to a small rental. Sell your car and buy a used beater. Eat all of your meals at home. Ditch home cable/satellite and internet. Ditch your cell phone.

If you’re reading those things and thinking, “I’m not going to do that,” then you’re choosing to stay in a situation where you can’t afford to pay your bills.

There is no magic recipe. There is no magic solution. The only way you can keep your bills paid is to spend less than you earn, and the only way to get there quickly is to make some major cuts to your spending. (You can also earn more money, but that generally takes more time as it often involves a job hunt and probably a career reboot.)

If you think that you “deserve” certain things, think again. No one “deserves” a nice house. No one “deserves” a nice car. No one “deserves” an iPhone with unlimited data. People earn those things. They’re perks. If your perks are keeping you from keeping your bills paid, then you’re going to have to dump some perks.

“But that sounds miserable!” It might be miserable, but, again, it comes down to mindset. Are you looking at and obsessing over the things you don’t have, or are you appreciating the things you do have? Are you depressed because you don’t have a mansion, or are you glad that you have any roof at all to keep the rain off your head? Are you depressed because you don’t have a shiny new car, or are you glad that you have the means to get around at all? Are you sad because you can’t afford exorbitant treats and trips, or are you happy because you just made some killer scrambled eggs for yourself?

Is the glass half empty or is the glass half full?

If the glass is half full, not being able to pay your bills is an easy problem to solve. You cut a lot of stuff, sure, but you get your bills in order. There’s a positive thing there.

If the glass is half empty, then the solution to your problem isn’t in the dollars and cents. It’s in your head. Once you learn to appreciate your situation as it is, then solving that problem is easy. If you can’t stop thinking about what you don’t have, then the problem will always be hard.

I Am Panicking Because My Credit Cards Are Maxed Out and I Can’t Get a New One

This is something of a cousin to the above question, except this person is often in a situation where they have the resources on hand to right their ship, but they’re just treading water and probably have a pretty bad credit rating.

Generally, the people in the “I have six credit cards that are all maxed out” situation are people who are otherwise in really good financial shape but have lost all grip on their day-to-day spending habits. Their household income is often really high and they’ve gotten so used to having plenty of money that they begin to charge things to the credit card without thinking about it and soon… boom. They’ve got a handful of maxed-out cards and don’t know what to do next.

I’m honestly stunned how often I hear some variation on this story.

The solution here is simple: get back to basics. Stop using plastic for purchases entirely until you get those bills paid down and get back in touch with the realities of your financial situation. Live entirely out of your checking account, and do it after paying all of your bills and making a big extra payment to the credit card with the highest interest.

Many people in this situation are often married and are not exactly making their credit card situation clear to their spouse. You have to come clean. Yes, it’s going to be hard, but if your debts are so bad that everything is maxed out and you’re juggling cards, you’re going to need help fixing things.

Sit down with your spouse, reveal everything, accept that your spouse is probably going to be pretty upset with you, and then work together to build a plan to fix it. Here’s my guide to creating a debt repayment plan that will work. I should know – it’s how we went from five figures in credit card debt and a bunch of other debts to complete debt freedom with a fully paid-off house.

• Related: Six Tactics for Handling Piles of Credit Card Debt

I Need a Financial Advisor

Unless you are incredibly wealthy, a financial advisor serves solely to excuse you from having to learn about your finances and investments yourself. Everything you really need to know about managing your money and investments, up to the point of being exorbitantly rich, can be found at your local library and online, for free.

It’s even more troubling than that, though. If you’re trusting all of your finances to a financial advisor without thoroughly understanding what their decisions are, you’re placing most of your financial future in the hands of someone who you hope will have at least a little of your best interests at heart. Many – but not all of them – do.

Without knowing your finances yourself, without knowing your options, you have no way of knowing whether or not that advisor is making good choices on your behalf. Of course, when you actually invest the time to know your own finances and know your options, you’ll realize that you don’t actually need an advisor at all for anything beyond a simple second pair of eyes to check your work (a quick session with a fee-based financial advisor is the right path).

Do you need a financial advisor? My guess is that if you’re writing to The Simple Dollar, the answer is almost definitely no. You might need a lawyer, though, if you’re concerned about legal implications, but if you’re just concerned about making good financial and investment decisions, the best thing you can possibly do for yourself isn’t hiring an advisor.

It’s learning.

Head down to the library, get some books on investing, and start reading. Educate yourself. Become the master of your own destiny. Put your money someplace safe while you’re learning, like a savings account, and then make moves when you begin to understand them.

Not only will you feel far better about your finances, you’ll also avoid the cost of a financial advisor almost entirely for the rest of your life.

Nothing beats education.

• Related: Six Times It Makes Sense to Hire a Financial Planner (and Three Times It Doesn’t)

I Want to Get Married but My Partner Has Very Different Financial Values Than Me

So, here’s a quick lesson about marriage. There are really only three things that matter: mutual love, mutual respect, and open communication. People with drastically different values can make a marriage work if they communicate.

What you have in this situation is two people with very different financial values. Typically, one person is fairly frugal and a saver, and the other person is a spender and doesn’t really worry about it at all.

If you have mutual love, mutual respect, and open communication, you can overcome this. You can figure out a solution that works for the two of you, where each of you compromise a little bit to find something in the middle that both of you can live with.

In the end, a lot of marriage is compromise, and compromise is the end result of a mix of love, respect, and communication. When you throw a problem into a batch of love, respect, and communication, you get good compromises.

So, ask yourself this. Do you feel completely comfortable talking about this difference in values between the two of you, and does your partner feel completely comfortable talking about it, too, without holding anything back? Do you have enough respect for your partner to understand that they have somewhat different values in this area than you and that they don’t have to completely change for you, and they have the same feelings back?

If you feel hesitant to say anything other than an unquestioned yes to those questions, then you need to very, very strongly question whether or not you should get married.

Remember, it is very possible to love a person deeply, but also recognize that there are differences between you that make it impossible to build a relationship together that will stand the test of time. That’s okay. What’s far worse is to try to force a lifelong commitment into a relationship that isn’t built for it, because it will eventually come crashing down in an incredibly painful way.

• Related: Why Your Spouse Is Your Most Important Money Decision

I’m Already Married and My Partner Has Very Different Financial Values Than Me

What do you do if you’ve already made that commitment and then you recognize that you and your partner have very different financial values?

Well, most of the above still applies.

Do you feel completely comfortable talking about this difference in values between the two of you, and does your partner feel completely comfortable talking about it, too, without holding anything back? Do you have enough respect for your partner to understand that they have somewhat different values in this area than you and that they don’t have to completely change for you, and they have the same feelings back?

If you do, then sit down and talk about it. Wrap this difference in values in a warm cocoon of communication, love, and respect and you’ll find yourself with a solution fairly quickly.

If you don’t… then there are deeper relationship issues going on than money issues. There’s a trust and a respect issue there, and it’s one that you’re going to have to solve before you can address money issues.

Those types of deep wedges – trust, respect, communication – are very difficult to correct. They can be fixed, but they take a real commitment from both sides that the relationship is worth it and that they’re willing to work for it and make changes within themselves.

Honestly, if that’s the path you’re going down, you need to be looking at a counselor who can actually help fix your marriage. Those types of issues are beyond the scope of a personal finance site.

• Related: Three Marriage-Saving Approaches to Take if Your Spouse’s Spending Is Out of Control

I Want to Be a Stay At Home Parent

This is a surprisingly frequent issue that comes up in reader questions. A person is suddenly looking at the possibility of having a child in a much more serious way than before and that person has come to the realization that they want to spend that child’s earliest years at home with them. Many parents want to bridge the gap between birth and entry into school; some may want to homeschool after that, while others may simply want to spend the first year or two at home.

My answer to this is simple and direct: Can you live on your spouse’s paycheck? If yes, then you can do this. If not, then can you and your spouse work together to develop a lifestyle that works on just one paycheck?

The ability to be a stay-at-home parent is a real perk for many people, a huge positive. It can even be a pretty big positive for the spouse that’s still working, because it means that the child is in a very safe and nurturing environment.

However, that big positive comes with a drawback: less household income. There is no magic way to slice this. If one member of the household stops working, there is going to be less money coming in.

So, what can you do? You prepare. You start changing your lifestyle now so that you know what it is like to live on one paycheck. You move, if necessary. You try living on just one paycheck, and use the other one entirely to secure and stabilize your finances by building an emergency fund, paying off debts, paying off student loans, and so forth. If stay-at-home parenting is really something you want to do and you’re both on board with it, start now. Start before that baby is ever on the way.

Another tip: When you have a child, whether you’re a stay-at-home parent or not, familial support is golden. It has incredible financial value. It saves on a lot of supplies, as you’ll probably have access to hand-me-downs and doting relatives. It saves on child care, as you’ll often have free babysitting available. It saves on de-stressing, as you’ll have people to talk to and offer suggestions. It helps immensely, in ways that you won’t think of or see until after the child is born. So, if you’re considering children at all, consider whether it makes sense to be near family.

Sometimes, these preparations will be enough. You’ll realize that you can make this work and you can be a stay at home parent. Sometimes… it won’t be enough. You’ll find that there are some things you just can’t decommit from, whether it’s your house or aspects of your lifestyle or something else. That’s okay, but it should come with the recognition that you’re swapping stay-at-home parenthood for those things that you won’t give up. Recognize what things you’re really comparing and make sure you’re okay with your choice.

• Related: The Type of Stay at Home Parent You Are Makes All the Difference

Final Thoughts

I really enjoy writing the Reader Mailbag columns each week because I’m constantly reminded of the human side of personal finance. It really isn’t just numbers. It really isn’t just formulas to follow. It’s about lives and the choices we’re constantly making to shape them.

More than anything, the mailbag shows me that people all over the world, from all walks of life, have a lot of similar concerns. They’re concerned about the people that they love the most. They’re concerned about what their future holds. They worry about their work. They worry about their dreams and whether they’ll be able to achieve them.

When I write the mailbag, I love highlighting stories that are, on the surface, very different, but when you start looking deeper, you realize that there’s a lot there that seems familiar. We all want better things, for us, for our families, for our communities, and for the world. We all have fears and worries and hopes – some are different, of course, but a lot are very, very similar.

We’re all just people.

When you go about your business today, look at the people around you and think to yourself that a lot of those people have or have had financial worries and thoughts a lot like your own. They may feel frustrated in their jobs. They may be wondering whether their relationships and families and friendships can stand up to financial pressures. They may yearn for things that are just out of reach. They may be worried about their immediate future or their long term future.

Just like you.

Have a great day.

Related Articles: 

• 12 Smart Financial Strategies for Those Struggling to Get Started
• 60 Simple Rules of Personal Finance
• How to Save Money: 100 Great Tips to Get You Started

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Make Your Kids Pay for These 7 Things: They’ll Thank You Later

The great allowance debate aside, we all want our kids to grow up to be financially smart and self-reliant. That means giving them the opportunity to practice handling and managing money. We all know it is better for them to make mistakes with $5, $20 or even $200 than to make major $50,000 mistakes as adults.

Whether your kids get a no-strings-attached, weekly allowance, are paid for chores or are given the opportunity to pick up small jobs at home and in your neighborhood, here are seven expenses they should be paying for themselves.

1. Checkout Line Gimmes

The checkout line is much less stressful when kids have their own money. You don’t have to feel like the mean parent who says no all day, but you also don’t have to indulge your child’s every last desire.

“Mom, can I have this 53rd pack of Pokemon cards or a bag of potato chips?”

“Sure! If you have enough money.”

2. Lost Lunchboxes, Backpacks, Etc.

Looking back, I’m surprised my mother didn’t tie all of my brother and my belongings to us each morning when we left for school. We were notorious for the sweater left in the gym locker room, a lunch box freezer pack accidentally thrown in the garbage or a mitten forgotten on the bus.

Sometimes we were able to recover our possessions, but others were lost for good. One way to get your kids to respect the cost of their stuff is to require them to replace it themselves.

If a lost item is too expensive, feel free to advance them the money if necessary — but expect them to pay you back through their allowance or side projects. And be sure to let them know that repaying debts comes before that new Lego video game.

3. Library Book Fines

Borrowing from the library is often a child’s first experience with loans and financial consequences. Teach them that if they are old enough to have their own library card, they are old enough to keep track of when their books are due.

A 15-cent late charge is better than a $25 late charge that can hurt their credit score as an adult. If they struggle with the concept, help them mark the due dates on the family calendar or let them put sticky notes with due dates on the book covers.

4. Toys and Video Games

Aside from holidays and birthdays, we can’t try to shell out for each and every thing our child sets their eyes on. Toys and video games are the perfect introduction to saving for most kids and a larger expense they can fund themselves.

Putting money in the bank for college or retirement is mystifying to an average 8-year-old, but stuffing $2 to $5 a week in their piggy bank for a robot dog may make perfect sense to them. Just be sure to maintain your veto rights over inappropriate or unsafe games.

5. Holiday and Birthday Gifts

If you’ve gone to a child’s birthday party lately, you have likely seen how out-of-control gift giving has become. Weddings are even worse. It is the suburban arms race.

Help your kids understand that a great gift is one that is thoughtful — and within the bounds of what they can afford. Let them plan out gifts for their siblings’ birthdays or for the holidays. Then, either help them set goals to save for those purchases or encourage them to make something by hand instead.

6. Cell Phone Plans

If your older kids have cell phones, make sure these regular expenses aren’t hidden from them. Bill from FamZoo makes sure his kids’ allowance is high enough to cover their part of the bill, as long as they budget for it, but there are other options too.

Let your child have a basic no-data-plan phone for emergencies — but if they want to surf the web and share photos on Instagram, they have to find a way to pay for themselves. This enforces the message that you may be willing to cover the “need” of reaching your kids at any time but that the other functions of a phone are still “wants”.

7. Entertainment and Outings

Family dinners and movie nights are outings that parents still pay for — that’s the joy of being a kid!

But the kids can pay themselves if they want to go bowling with their friends, take the optional school trip to Six Flags or meet for ice cream. This gives them the opportunity to weigh their options and learn that they can afford anything — but not everything.

Childhood is about freedom and fun, but it is also about learning. Make sure you’re giving your child a chance to learn how to budget and make smart spending decisions!

Chelsea Brennan is an investment professional, mother, and founder of the family finance site, Mama Fish Saves. Her passion is helping parents feel empowered about money so they can reach their goals and raise financially smart kids!

This was originally published on The Penny Hoarder, one of the largest personal finance websites. We help millions of readers worldwide earn and save money by sharing unique job opportunities, personal stories, freebies and more. In 2016, Inc. 500 ranked The Penny Hoarder as the No. 1 fastest-growing private media company in the U.S.

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6 in 10 Americans don’t check their credit report regularly – which is a bad idea.

To check your credit report, or not to check your credit report – that is the question. And for 59% of Americans, the answer is not to check your credit report, or at least not check it often, according to the results of a national survey of 1,000 people released in August.

The survey revealed that only about four in 10 (41%) of Americans actually check their credit report once a year or more often, which can be a mistake. Your credit report is a huge source of information on how to improve your credit score, as well as a great way to keep an eye out for signs of identity theft.

If you’re among the six in 10 people who aren’t checking your credit report regularly, here’s what you need to know:

What is a credit report?

A credit report is a detailed statement of your credit history. Reports are generated by and provided to lenders by one of the three major credit bureaus – Experian, TransUnion, and Equifax. Your report will contain information including:

• Identifying information
• Credit accounts
• Credit inquiries
• Public records and collections

Everything except for your identifying information is used to generate your credit score – a three-digit number to help lenders identify your creditworthiness based on where your score falls within a set range.

Why is a credit report important?

Your credit report is important because it’s used by lenders to make financial decisions about you. The information provided on your report is what determines your credit score. If you’ve ever opened a credit card, taken out a car loan, applied for an apartment to rent, and so on, then you’ve had someone check your credit score and run a credit report on you.

That’s why it’s so important that your credit report is up to date and accurate. If you aren’t checking your credit report at least once a year (which is free to do), then how do you know everything is correct, and you’re getting the most favorable terms?

Or, how do you know that someone hasn’t opened a couple of credit cards in your name and gone on a spending spree? Your credit report will show any and all accounts that are open in your name, as well as any companies that may have inquired about your credit report. If you see something you don’t recognize, you can dispute it (more on that later) or take steps to protect your identity.

You may think checking your credit report doesn’t matter if you already know you have bad credit or no credit history, but it’s still important. Understanding your relationship with credit and then taking proactive steps – such as using a credit card for bad credit responsibly – will help improve your score. For instance, if you look at your report and see you often miss deadlines, you can sign up for payment reminders or set a calendar alert.

How do I get a free credit report?

To request a copy, visit AnnualCreditReport.com – the only authorized website – or call 1-877-322-8228 and provide your identifying information, such as name, address, Social Security number, and birth date. You can request a free copy of your credit report once every 12 months from one or all three of the credit reporting bureaus. This means you can get one every few months or all three at once depending on how often you’d like to check it.

How do I dispute a credit report error?

If you find an error on your credit report, you can dispute it by contacting both the credit reporting company and the organization that provided the information (i.e., your loan lender). The Federal Trade Commission recommends that you submit a letter in writing with copies of your documents via certified mail.

Credit companies must investigate any disputes brought up to them and then inform you of the decision in writing. Additionally, information providers who continue to report disputed items must notify the credit reporting company about your dispute. Information that is found to be incorrect or incomplete must be updated or deleted from your report. If a dispute is not resolved, you can request that a statement of dispute be included in your file.

Your credit report is an important source of information to both you and potential lenders. That’s why it’s important to join the 41% of Americans who check it regularly to ensure that everything is accurate and complete.

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